Letao Chen’s short film, “Mid-itation,” is a response to the absurdity of the online world, a place where influencers promise enlightenment but trade it for engagement, and where authenticity is championed above all else while our personas are more carefully curated than ever. Chen tells Marigold Warner she tried to make sense of the chaos.
Allow yourself a few short minutes of intentional reflection. Letao Chen’s rendered face fills the screen, her hypnotic drawl guiding a meditation for the chronically-online. The ensuing scenes are both captivating and disorienting. Chen’s body is either contorted or in a seated yoga pose with a chakra of symbolic objects—an Elf Bar, a Yoni Egg and a stuffed Squirrel among them—orbiting her head. The setting switches to an ominous, snow-filled landscape, as the line between satire and sincerity continues to blur: I do not want to be talented, I want to be a drop shipper.
This is the London-based artist’s short film, “Mid-itation,” a parody of the self-help guru and critique of the commodification of spirituality, wellness and authenticity. Chen’s robotic voice paces through a string of fragmented thoughts, unraveling an astute commentary on identity and the absurdities of internet culture: Am I real enough to be loved, and unique enough to be sold?
They’re enlightened, but they’re getting BBL injections. We’re not really talking about how absurd it actually is.
Born in Beijing and raised in the US, Chen created “Mid-itation” during her MA in Fashion Image at Central Saint Martins (CSM). She made the entire video in Unreal Engine—with some sculpting in Blender—over the course of around four to five months. The title is a play on slang, but it also speaks to the idea of being in-between. Historically, meditation has existed as an all-encompassing practice, a way of life rather than a quick fix. “Now, because everyone moves so quickly and has nine-to-fives, it’s just injected into our lunch breaks,” Chen observes. Guided affirmations, sleep stories, sound bath playlists, manifestation journals—the pursuit of mindfulness is commodified and championed by “gurus” who trade enlightenment for engagement. “It’s funny how these people believe they’re really spiritual, and then they’re hitting a vape. They’re enlightened, but they’re getting BBL [Brazilian butt lift] injections,” says Chen. “We’re not really talking about how absurd it actually is.”
At the core of “Mid-itation” is an interrogation into identity, performance and the internet’s obsession with authenticity. Chen has always been “obsessed” with identity, largely shaped by her own experiences. “I grew up in a very rich and very white-washed suburb in Minnesota,” says the 24-year-old artist. Image-making and social media became a way for her to resist racial stereotypes. “My relationship with beauty is tumultuous… I didn’t believe that I could be beautiful until I was 20. I was brainwashed to the point where someone complimented me and I literally responded, ‘I can’t be. I’m not white,’” she says. “That really drew me into image-making, being able to use the image to feel agency and control over who you are and who you want to be.”
I was asking myself a lot of questions about what it means to have an identity in this age.
It was Chen’s move to London two years ago that initiated a deeper investigation into how we present ourselves online. The lack of stability of moving to a new city made her turn inwards. “I was asking myself a lot of questions about what it means to have an identity in this age,” she says. Online, there is an increasing tension between being “authentic” and being “performed.” Self-presentation is increasingly curated, yet paradoxically expected to appear effortless. “Mid-itation” speaks to these ideas, and the pressure to maintain a unique identity in a world where trends move at an overwhelming speed. I’m looksmaxxing my shadow self. I’m pinterest boarding myself into someone you cannot hurt.
“I really wanted to validate the confusion,” says Chen, who has explored a range of mediums to create similar social critiques. Before turning to 3D, she made video essays on YouTube. One went viral, amassing 5.7 million views for criticizing Brandy Melville’s one-size policy. She recently published a long-form essay on SubStack exploring how we navigate authenticity in an era of constant reinvention, irony and hyper-consumption.
Her rendered universe in “Mid-itation” reflects the chaos of being online. It’s a world where cupping therapy leaves Chanel-imprinted bruises, and where Pinterest boards are dedicated to aesthetically-shot cups of water. It’s a place where clarity and contradiction coexist—where your greatest friend might just be an anthropomorphized Squirrel.
As part of a feedback session during the MA at CSM, Chen’s film was critiqued for its lack of fashion. This made Chen further question the idea of “fashion beyond garments.” “Our digital avatar is something we put on,” she says. “The eye masks are accessories. Even the vape is an accessory. The film is about constructing a character through these minute, almost imperceptible details. I wanted to bring awareness to that—the way the glossiness over the skin, or even the moles I painted onto this digital version of myself, become part of a self-fashioned identity.”
“Mid-itation” doesn’t offer any answers. In fact, it leaves us with more questions. Do we value individuality, or just the appearance of it? Are we all trapped in the algorithm’s version of ourselves? Is a rejection of all of this just another form of participation in it? We have come so far from home, says Chen in the film, followed by her final plea in dystopic ASMR: Like and subscribe. Please, like and subscribe.